The Folkmoss Logs

Blogging just because

Writing just because is liberating. Blogging just because is cathartic. It's like releasing a pressure valve you didn't even know was stuck inside you. I've been doing a lot of blog reading lately and there's nothing more inspiring to writing than reading. It's been particularly cool reading about people's own experience and perspective about self-expression online, which can range from blogging to website-making to literally list-making. Lo and behold, I've been playing with all three categories (coincidence? I think not). Since I started with my website on Neocities, life online has not only been "bearable", it's been good. Refreshing. Fun! I'm learning new things about such different topics by visiting a bunch of different personal websites and blogs. A lot of times they don't even converge to my particular interests, but regardless of that, it's still a learning experience.

Writing hasn't come easy to me for many, many years now. Maybe the last time it was fun and "easy" was in my early twenties. I'm in my mid thirties. Not only over a decade older, but also maybe (and mainly) a different person. In my online perusals I stumbled upon Herman's blog post about active rest and it felt like I was taking a punch to the chest, knocking the air out of me. Of course. Active rest.

Finishing up a long day of work only to plop down on the couch and turn on a slightly larger screen for entertainment is the real adversary. My brain needs rest, but not this kind. [...] The best form of relaxation isn't consumption, it's creation.

Now, bear with me for a moment here, I want to share a little sliver of my personal experience with that.

Even though I had a bout of creative activity in 2020 (writing, taking part in online literary events, having some short stories published), a global pandemic will crush your spirit sooner rather than later. Before 2019 I was basically going through life on autopilot for a few years. There wasn't a lot of creative juices flowing around my noggin', and after the first year of the pandemic went by, the little juice I managed to squeeze dried out. I then got into gaming. Yes, I'm a late, late, late bloomer when it comes to gaming. Got myself a Nintendo Switch (my first ever console!), started giving my money to Steam (cries in I don't own anything) and then I realized: playing video games made me feel so much better than whatever it was that I was doing before. It made me realize that doing something was so much better than looking at something.

Since getting back to having a website back in October, that was something I noticed as well. The time I spent tweaking my webpage, browsing for stamps, hot gluing code together and creating something for myself was actually doing me good (can you imagine?). I was still struggling to put the feeling into words, but Herman managed that on that post. Of course, in the post, he highlights how manual crafts and hobbies are important for someone who mostly works in front of a screen, and that is something I still struggle with myself (website making is still on a screen, y'know). But finally understanding why social media in general felt like it drained my energy rather than making me feel rested was a true release. Scrolling on Instagram after work is not going to make you feel rested, I'll tell you that much.

I'm now actively looking for something to do with my hands. I'm honestly not good at anything, so that'll be another struggle. I know you don't need to be good at your hobbies (you just have to watch me play a video game to truly understand how acutely aware I am of that 🤪), but it's still nice when you are, just a little bit. At the very least it helps to keep doing it consistently.

Anyways. Now on to

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