Fickle memory & link recs
If you're just interested in seeing cool links and quick updates, you can skip the sop of "Fickle memory" and go straight to the fun stuff below.
Fickle memory
I've been feeling very disconnected from the world lately. It might be because I'm alone in the house since the aunties left for Miami, but I do know ppl in the city, I'm just not... talking to anybody, or planning any type of social interaction. I just stay home, either watching something on the TV or doing whatever on the computer. I haven't eaten proper meals or done anything other than stretch a little every day. Had plenty of time to go outside and jog around the beautiful park nearby, and I haven't moved. I only left the apt on Friday because I was kind of peer pressured to.
If anything, the pandemic taught me I can go a loooong time without social interaction without craving it at all. But the more isolated I am, the more I want to stay that way, and that's never healthy. I suck being alone -- I feel way too comfortable. The only reason I take care of myself is because of others; if there are no others, there is no need for self-care.
My natural tendency to inaction doesn't help either. I've got a bunch of books I wanna read, video games I wanna play, movies I wanna watch... and I do nothing. I don't do anything I want to do, let alone what I should do. (Welcome to the life of an ADHDer.)
The funny thing is, I don't remember it being like this for me before the pandemic. Truth be told, I don't know what I've become. I don't think it was like this a few years ago... But I'm not sure I remember how I was, honestly. My fickle memory strikes again.
Link recs & updates
- Found this 1960s video about Sicily by Pathé. I always joke that if everything goes awry in life I'll move to Sicily and start over. Maybe Google heard me, after all, but got the year wrong.
- Been listening to GAKHED's channel on loop in the evenings. Highly recommend it. Dim the lights, let it playing on the background and go do something you enjoy.
- Rediscovered Emancipator's Soon It Will Be Cold Enough; also recommend it. I listened to it a lot when it was released in the early aughts.
- Added a bunch of resources to the Bookmarks Dump Site, notably premade templates and a few doll makers.
- Also found a cool tool to pixelite pics and a few avatar makers on Itch.io.
- This button maker tool is new to me, but apparently widely known in the indie web. I made a bunch of buttons for myself, now I gotta... update my abandoned website and include them.
General updates
Life sucks atm. My sister got fired from her 5-year long job at an advertising agency, which was a shock. I believe she's better off, but it's never a good place to be in. My friend from São Paulo will be fired in early May, which is to say the publication she works at will be extinguished until then. And my close, dear friend who is also my neighbor, is planning her move to live 1,000 km away from me very soon and I'm sad for myself but happy for her.
Had a big argument with my partner a few days later. I always feel that whenever we are apart, we butt heads more, we argue more, it's like we don't work well away from each other. And when told me he had a hook up, I didn't feel the pang of jealously I usually feel (we have an open relationship) when that happens when I'm away from home.
I did manage -- for the first time -- to make the cute space buns hairstyle on my fucking hair. It's a real accomplishment for me, okay? 
Got a bunch of more freelance work to do (one two-day event later this month, one translation, one copyediting job), and now I gotta do them... weird.