On money

12 Oct, 2025

Every time I feel good about myself and about life in general, I notice there's literally just one thing that is different for me: I have money and I won't struggle to pay bills for the near future. Just that. There's money in the bank. I can breathe. Even my psychiatrist talked about this with me: first I should focus on stabilizing myself so I could can work well and consistently, and the rest would follow. Years ago, that didn't feel true at the time, but now I see it with immense clarity that she was 100% correct.

If you have enough money to live, every other struggle becomes manageable. You can pay for good food, you eat better, you feel better. You can buy quality clothing, people respect you more and hire you more often. You can pay for a gym subscription or a yoga/pilates class. You sleep better because there's less stuff screaming inside your brain. You can purchase books and games and gadgets. They make up for happiness, too. You can afford a weekend trip. You can have health care for yourself (and your cats!). You can even rescue stray cats again and pay for their care without having to beg for others to help. You can help them without drowning yourself in credit card debt. If something breaks in the house, you can pay for repairs or replacement. You can make your place look nice and comfortable and practical and oh god...

I don't think people who never struggled financially understand what the opposite of all of this is like. It's just permanent dread. It's waking up dreading how much living that day will cost you and going to bed dreading the next one. Ad infinitum.

Anyways, get that money and live a good life and help others in your community whenever you can, folks.

#blog #life #port #rant